What better way to start my review site than by reviewing my own website www.ihateyourwebsite.com ? Don’t think I’m going to be nice. There are many things I don’t like about my own website that hopefully will get improved over time.

Kinda funny concept - It’s possible I only like the concept because it’s mine, but I think this is a fairly original concept for a website. There are sites that only write about other sites. There are sites that review other sites. But most of them kiss ass in 75% or more of their posts. I hate your website.com is not about kissing ass, it’s about kicking ass.

White, black and more white - The color scheme of this site is lacking any sort of color (aside from the ads and the one green link I’ve been struggling to find the code for). These colors would be perfect if this were a blog about skunks or old timey movies, but it ain’t. There needs to be a highlight or accent somewhere. The black text on white background is always a safe choice but isn’t very interesting. For sure there needs to be more color on here to avoid polar bear in a snowstorm syndrome.

The Ted Kazinski style title fits - I’m typically a bit pissed off and prone to going on rants. This title fits me. It’s simple, matches the lame color scheme and portrays some of the annoyance that will no doubt fill this site. Just like the unibomber I’m starting to hate the internet. I can’t even Google a simple topic (i.e. how to hire a hitman or how much bleach is needed to get blood off an undershirt) without having to wade through millions of pointless sites that are only there to get traffic and trick morons into clicking on their ads. I honestly think most sites on the web these days were assembled in five minutes or less. For the record, this one took 10.

Not too many ads, that’s good - The aforementioned sites that only exist to make money are full of ads. There are stupid boxes that pop up when your mouse grazes pass a green double underlined word, there are videos that play over the text and there are Google ads that seem to interrupt every single paragraph. Not on this site. There is a banner, a single link box and a Google search feature (which is more useful than harmful). That’s it. Nothing too garish (yet). I’d like to at least earn some beer money from this site, so there might be new things in the future. But for now I’m happy with the small amount of ads. I think you should be too.

There’s no content - Literally, none. This review, an apology and the about page are the only things on the site. That’s lame. There needs to be dozens of other reviews, off-topic rants and pixelated camera phone photos. No doubt there will be. That is if you e-mail me at carl@ihateyourwebsite.com to review your site.

The tone is irreverent - Is that good or bad? I like it, you probably don’t. So fuck you. I don’t care what you think, I’m doing this site because I want to. I could care less if you ever visit it again. Unless you love this type of shit, then come back all you want.

Conclusion: Sucks for now - This website blows right now. I don’t really blame the people who don’t like it. There’s nothing here, it’s boring to look at and I’m being an asshole. But hopefully it’ll start to turn around once it gets some content and finds its legs.